100-day challenge: Day 50

If anyone had told me the first 50 days would pass by this fast, I wouldn’t have believed them. (Much like the years of my life - I blinked, and I was in my 50s.)

On 1 May 2015, I set myself a 100-day challenge: to dance for 20 minutes a day, for 100 (consecutive) days.  A bout of flu saw me stopping for about 12 days. When I resumed, I decided to approach it differently, for a number of reasons.

This was my thinking: I LOVE dancing, it makes me feel fabulous, I’m getting steadily fitter, and I want to keep doing this for as long as I’m able to. However, my life gets really busy, and it’s not always possible to fit in a workout. There’s so much to do, that I often get to 10pm and realise I still have another hour of responsibilities. In order to get enough sleep before the next hectic day, it doesn’t make sense to force myself to dance, especially when it means I’d get even less sleep. If life has taught me anything, it's that sleep is very important. 

After thinking it through, I committed to dancing every second day, which turned out to be a lot more realistic. I promised myself I would not skip more than one day between workouts, and…. so far, so good (for the past 9 days). I also told myself I’d dance on consecutive days, whenever possible. School holidays are ahead, my life will assume a more relaxed pace, and I’ll fit in as many dance sessions as possible.   

Yesterday was Day 49, and I did my 27^th workout. It’s the weekend, I have some Trudy-time coming my way, so I look forward to dancing. I used to do just 20 minutes, but now I can last for 35. It’s a wonderful feeling, moving freely to music and feeling myself going from being cold to getting so warm that I feel I could dance forever.

The truth is, it’s been only 7 weeks. I’m working through unfitness that took years to settle in. I need to stick to my resolve, and not give up. I can feel my body changing. I can even feel my spirit changing. I feel good, doing regular exercise. I feel younger. I’m starting to feel stirrings of a past time, a time when I used to run and do aerobics. A long time ago. J The point is, I need to be patient, and just ‘keep on keeping on’. External results always appear after the internal ones.

I knew the 100 days would teach me something, and that’s exactly what’s happening. In 2003, I did the Mind Power course, with Robin Banks, Early in the course, we discussed why people don’t reach their goals. Personally, I’ve found that my main reason for not achieving some of my goals is that, often, I’m just too unrealistic. For me, to think that I could add anything to my daily routine is unrealistic. Maybe I’ll get it right someday, but, right now, it’s not sustainable.

In the past, I’d set a goal, fail to stick to it, become demotivated, feel like a failure, and give up. I’m no longer that person.

This is my reality: I have a day job that takes up 7 and a half hours per day (excluding the extra time teachers work at home!). Travelling takes up about one and a half hours per day. Those two alone take up 10 hours of my day. Then there are all my domestic responsibilities – maybe another 3 hours? 13 hours. Being so active makes me tired, physically and emotionally, so I have to do downtime things, to restore some sense of balance. Before I know it, it’s late at night. In order to fit in regular dancing, I’ve got to arrange my whole week a certain way. In addition, for the past four and a half months I’ve had a bi-weekly gig at a restaurant, so that kept me even busier. It took trial and error to get me to the solution of dancing every second day.

I’m grateful for this lesson in setting realistic goals. Someone else helped me understand more about goal setting – my friend, Patricia Manshon, founder and head of the Academy of Life Coaching. She adapted the goal-setting acronym “SMART” (specific, measurable, attainable, realistic and time-bound) to “SMARTIE”, adding the words “Inspirational” and “Emotional”. If my goals aren’t inspirational and don’t have an effect on my emotions, I feel too disconnected, and there’s very little chance of my sticking to them.  

Interestingly enough, one of the quotations in my appointment diary, this week, was:

"To be all that you can be, you must dream of being more. To achieve the possible, you must attempt the impossible."  Karen Ravn

After quite a few years of becoming increasingly unfit, I have just lived through 50 days during which I danced 27 times. That’s a huge achievement for me, and I’m super-proud of myself!

Wish me luck for the next 50 days.   

    

About Blogging

As an English lecturer, I have to teach students “how to write a blog”. Firstly, I think the textbook writers fail to make a clear distinction between a “blog” – which is your own, free website, which you can personalise and use like a journal, to write about anything you like - and a “blog post”, which is an article you post/upload onto your blog/website. 

It’s quite a technical approach, in the textbook, and of course I have to make sure every student knows s/he has to include a title, name and surname, and the date. Other technical aspects to be reminded of are paragraphing, the ‘Big 3’ – introduction, body and conclusion - and sticking to the word count.  

As a blogger, myself, there’s so much else I want to teach them, and I just hope that those who do enjoy writing, actually go on to start their own blogs and enjoy the journey.

I’ve come to the conclusion that most things that we end up doing well, later in life, are things we’ve loved all our lives, and usually have been doing for most of our lives. For me, writing is one of those things. I started blogging in 2009, but I’ve been journalling since 1977 – 38 years ago. Before that, I was always writing letters, and I know I had a few pen-friends, as a child.  

Over the years, my journalling has played an increasingly significant role in my life, but one truth that I’ve been living with for many years is that, in order for me to feel right, I have to write. If I go for a few days without writing (especially journalling), I feel like something’s missing. I would actually call myself a compulsive writer. When I sit at the hairdresser, I’m given magazines to read, but what I’d really rather be doing, is writing! Yes! Maybe I should buy myself a tablet, something nice and portable, then I could do just that.

My cellphone? Well, now there’s a story. I’m one of those people who use my phone for just a few things – mainly texting, making calls and taking photos -  so if my current phone, which I’ve had for about four years can do those, I don’t see the need to buy a new phone. I actually have a phone which pre-dates the Smart phone, so I suppose an upgrade is overdue. I annoy everyone because I’m not on WhatsApp. :-)

So why do I blog? Quite simply - I love writing. I love writing to express my thoughts, my views, my questions, my frustrations and my observations. Doing so on the internet, on my own blog, was suggested to me by two people, a few years apart. Once I’d started, I was hooked. In my first two years, I think I wrote 50+ posts each year. Now, six years later, I don’t blog anywhere near as often as that, but the truth is, I think about writing every single day. I would love my daily routine to include blogging. Because we share one laptop at the moment, I can’t always access it when I have the time to blog. So, for now, I’ll just do it whenever I can.

I learnt, a long ago, that, when you’re a busy person who takes on extra projects and challenges, you aren’t always able to find time, on a daily basis, to do the things you’re passionate about. However, you always have a choice: would you rather follow your passion some of the time, or give it up completely?  For me, the choice was clear – even though my life is laden with responsibility and duty, I find the time to fit in what I love.

At this point in my life, my loves are playing my guitar and singing, writing, and dancing. I’ve also loved swimming ever since I was a child, but right now, it’s not logistically possible for me to swim. Once I have a car again, and I’ve regained my independence, a lot more will become possible.

So - what are you passionate about? And why aren’t you making time to do it?  

What are you waiting for? 

100-day exercise challenge: Day 33

Day 33. I've just started the second month of my 100-day challenge, and it's certainly been different to what I'd planned. But, as I keep telling myself, the most important thing is that I see the 100 days through, without quitting. 

After 14 consecutive days of dancing, I had to interrupt my exercise routine, because I'd caught the flu. At first I danced even though I was sick, hoping it would pass, but I could feel myself getting weaker, as my condition worsened. People (on Facebook) cautioned me against exercising while sick, as it would strain my heart. I didn't want to complicate my life, and I looked forward to continuing my programme after the flu, so I stopped. At first I stopped for just  three days, then danced for two, but felt so bad, that I had to give myself a good talking to. Sometimes I'm so keen to achieve a goal, that I get tunnel vision. 

I then stopped for ten days, while I took meds and gave my body a chance to rest and recover.  Getting back into the routine was not straight forward; I danced on Day 30, but not the next day. Last night, however, I did my 18th dance workout - I've discovered it's called freestyle dancing -  and I felt that wonderful buzz of being back on track. 

It was a very cold day yesterday, and when it was time for me to dance (I dance at night), I had to fight the urge to skip exercising and lie in a hot bath, instead. Brrrrrr! However, once I'd put on my exercise clothes, I started feeling that familiar excitement. Once  I heard the first few notes of the music, I was hooked. After the first song, I was quite warm, and after the second, I needed to remove my long-sleeved top. 

From then on - and this happens every time - I'm in the zone, as they say, and I just have fun. Dancing makes me smile, it makes me forget my stresses, and allows me to believe that anything's possible. 

I plan to stick to my 100-day challenge, as far as is humanly possible. Day 33 - only 67 to go.  And then? Can't see myself stopping after 100 days. 

100-day exercise challenge: day 5

Day 5, and all's well. I enjoy dancing so much, that the past three sessions have ended up being 25 minutes long, and not 20. I have to pace myself. because I'm still very unfit, and I don't want to pull a muscle, by getting ahead of myself.  

All I can say is, I'm excited about having set myself this 100-day challenge, and I love the way it's already started affecting me. I feel like my joints are loosening up, I feel more rhythmical when I walk, and I love not telling my colleagues, who see me every day, that this is what I'm busy with. It's my special thing that I'm doing, just for myself (for a change). 

I can feel myself changing in other ways, so I'm even more excited about this journey of 100 days, because I think I'll be achieving a lot more than just regaining my belief that I am disciplined. When I danced tonight, I decided to move away from the standard dance/zumba steps; instead, I filled  my head with my longing for freedom and autonomy, in all areas of my life, and I danced that desire. It was incredible! I can't wait for tomorrow's dance time. 

I think dance has actually started a 100-day challenge with me! 

                       I'm a nocturnal person, so I love dancing at night - my favourite time of day. 

100-day exercise challenge: day 3

Inspired by something I saw on Facebook, I started a 100-day challenge on 1 May: I set myself a goal of dancing for 20 minutes a day, every day, for one hundred days.  So far, so good. I really love dancing – it makes me smile, I feel wonderful when I’m moving to music, and it clears my head, leaving me feeling anything’s possible. 

So far (just 2 days), I’ve used two short playlists I put together on my phone. I dance in my bedroom, late at night, and I keep the lights low. Beautiful sensation. Before I know it, the 20 minutes are up. I need to find a better slot of time, and incorporate it into my daily routine. I also realise I need to increase my vitamin intake, to include Magnesium. I’ve been unfit for so long, that my muscles are really aching after just the first two days.  I know it will get better.

Why am I doing this? For so many reasons. Right now, I’ve got to get off the internet – will write more as I proceed through this challenge. 

All I know is, I’m excited about this challenge I’ve set myself, and I’m looking forward to the journey. 

Quality time

Some things went very well, today. I am grateful to have a gem of a colleague, who swopped a class with me today, to help me out. I'm also relieved that a sticky matter I've been dealing with has just about been resolved. I'll exhale in a few weeks' time. 

I'm happy to have a warm, welcoming house to come home to. Even though there are so many things that need fixing, the most important things are in place. My home is my haven, and I always feel happy to return to it.  Wherever life may take me, I always want my home to feel this way. 

I've raised my children to understand that the things that money can buy can always be bought - when you have the money - but the really important things, like love, patience, and just being there for each other, listening with real interest, and laughing together, are things that no amount of money could ever buy. I'd say those are the most important things in life. You could live in the most beautiful house, with all the fancy furniture and appliances, but that wouldn't guarantee happiness. 

I live in a house with so many broken things, I don't even know where to start fixing or replacing. But we live in peace. We talk, not shout. We listen, not talk over each other's voices. We understand that solo time is important, and we give each other plenty of space to pursue our individual interests. We make time to do things together, but we have a healthy regard for each other's privacy.  

I've always believed that quality time with my children was whenever we were together. In the end, that philosophy got us through many tough years, when we were forced to live together on a part-time basis only. But my kids understood that it was okay to sit in the kitchen and tell me about their day, while I was cooking. We didn't need to contrive quality time. And that's basically my approach to most relationships. Just be real.   

I'm happy to have music in my life. And even though I don't get to perform with the person I most want to, I'm enjoying having a solo restaurant gig - it balances out my life in such a beautiful way. 

Universe - I know you're listening to me. I can feel it. All the signs are there that I'm on the brink of something wonderful. I'll keep sending you messages from my heart every day. 

On my mind

Challenging myself to type a blog post that gives me an opportunity to offload, in thirty minutes.  Alarm’s set, so here goes.

I’ve been thinking about a few things, all day. One of them was all the things I’m grateful for. I’ve had three periods in my life when I was unemployed, even though one of them was by choice. The other two occasions tested me in many ways. I am grateful to be employed, with a set salary that helps me maintain my family. The flipside to my gratitude is sadness. I am saddened by how widespread poverty is, in our country, and how devastating its effects are. I see it every day - it knocks on my door, begging for food, clothes, money, broken appliances, tin cans – anything. And even though I chose to write that sentence that way, I am painfully aware that poverty is a despicable by-product of our skewed society, and that it’s real people who come to my door – individuals who have been dragged down lower than I’m sure they imagined possible.

A second thing on my mind, all day, was the phrase, “There are no problems - only opportunities.”  I think I read it in Benjamin Zander’s book, “The Art of Possibility”, which he co-authored with his wife, Rosamund Stone Zander. If this is really true, I’ve had some amazing possibilities come my way, recently. Haha! You know that feeling of being kicked while you’re down? That! But life goes on, and I refuse to quit. I’m much stronger than most people realise. Much.

But lastly – I’ve been thinking about friendship, all day……especially friendships that endure, that defy geography and time. I think about my friends who live abroad now, in Australia, New Zealand, the USA and the UK. I also have good friends who live in the UAE. And then I have friends who live in other parts of my own country, especially in Gauteng. I have a special friend in Oz, whom I met when we were both six years old. I have another beautiful friend, in Gauteng, whom I met when I was 17 and she was 15.  These people are part of my life story – they knew me long before I became the Trudy my new friends know me as. J Long before I 'grew up" and became a teacher and a musician.

I recently went to a mini class reunion, with nine other people from my very special high school class that stayed together for five years. We’re all basically the same age, most are married, most of us are parents, and some are even grandparents. I enjoy hanging out with them. Yes, we do reminisce a lot, but we also spend time chatting about other things. I feel like I can be exactly who I am, with them, and it’s  a good feeling.

I’m about to hit 50 minutes of writing (incl. editing), so I think I’ll stop now. :-)