A story to be told

Do you know that I think about writing throughout the day? I always have so much on my mind, so many observations of life, so much to get out of my system and put into words, that, by the time I actually sit down in front of my laptop, I have at least three different ways I could start my piece. I yearn to write more often, and I should make it happen. If you love something, you should do it.

I’ve been on a short college break – just one week, hugged by two weekends – and today’s the last week day before the last weekend. Why am I up so early, then? It’s garbage collection day, or ‘Bin Day’, as we call it. I have to get up and haul the huge bin to the street before the truck gets here. I’ve been doing it for years, so it’s just one of those regular chores that keep the household running. Just another thread in the rich tapestry of life.

                          My neighbour's mulberry tree in full bloom - spring is indeed here.

Over the past few weeks, I’ve felt a significant shift of energy, and I’m fascinated by it. I’ve made a conscious decision to live my life with more awareness, on many fronts. One of the things I’ve started doing is, on becoming aware that I’m awake each morning, allowing this thought to fill my head: “I accept the universe’s gift of a new day, and I give the universe the gift of myself.”

I’ve been feeling a strong sense of inexorability, as though what I’ve been moving towards, my whole life, is just around the corner. It’s a wonderful space to be in, because my restlessness has been at an all-time high. The more I experience and learn, and realise how much bigger the world is than my everyday routine exposes me to, the more I’m convinced of the imminence of a stronger, more profound shift. All I know is, by this time next year, my life will be different in both a visible and a spiritual way, and I’ll be going through my daily stuff with a deep feeling of having found my purpose. I can feel its proximity, and I’m excited.

My head feels clearer, and I feel a sense of immediacy and connection, when I contemplate - and then make – decisions. Only when I become this focused, do I realise for how long I’ve been wading through life under a cloud of uncertainty, self-doubt, and all those other things that prevent us from living life to our full potential.

This has been an awesome week. It started with my being part of a World Teachers’ Day event. I sang two of my original songs to a group of about 50 educators, and I participated in the day’s workshops. I’ll post the article I put on Facebook, explaining the day and how it impacted on me. I met new people, I learnt a lot, and I left the event fundamentally different – still proud to be an educator, but deeply moved and inspired to do so much more.

                                         Kalk Bay Harbour, from the railway station.

On Tuesday, my daughter and I went to Kalk Bay, a quaint, seaside town situated just seven stations from where we live. We hopped onto a train, and made our way to this little piece of heaven. We spent the morning there, enjoying the hippie vibe and buying the things we go there for: ankle chains, earrings and fun clothing items. My daughter always buys succulents (plants) and we always buy second hand books. This time, I bought four:

1.   ‘Lucky Man’ - autobiography by actor, Michael J Fox

2.   ‘My Own Private Orchestra’ – by Ian Fraser, a South African actor and playwright

3.    ‘Escape’ – Carolyn Jessop (a memoir by a woman who escaped from a religious cult)

4.   ‘Dancer’ – by Colum Mc Cann (about a poor Russian boy who grows up to be a world-famous ballet dancer)

                     I've already started reading Lucky Man - compellingly written. 

I’ve become fascinated, all over again, by people telling their own stories. When I was younger, I used to love reading autobiographies and biographies. It seems I lost my essential self for a few decades, but have come right back to that knowing, that truth, that people telling their own stories is the most riveting of all.  

When I was trying to decide what to sing at the World Teachers’ Day event, I grappled with the usual dilemma – whether to sing well-known, people-placating covers, or to sing my own compositions. I went with my gut, and sang, at the opening of the event, my song called “In the Shade of Table Mountain”. It’s about people who were forcibly removed, by the apartheid regime, from an area called District Six, close to our beautiful mountain, and their yearning to go back and live – and die - in the shade of Table Mountain. It was the perfect song, because the event was held in the District Six Homecoming Centre, and the theme, throughout the day, was of people telling their own stories. The hook of my song goes, “All around in my city / People who are just like me / Each one has a story to be told”. (You can watch my video on youtube.)

                            Inside the District Six Homecoming Centre, on World Teachers' Day.

 At the end of the event, I sang another of my originals, called “My Favourite Time of Day”, a mellow bossa nova. The facilitator of the event asked me to conclude with a sing-along song, so I did “You’ve Got a Friend”, by Carole King. Even though I called out the words before each phrase, to help those who didn’t know the words (most did), I was struck quite powerfully by something - that the songs I regarded as sing-along songs were culturally specific, and that my Xhosa-speaking contemporaries were being left out. Life opens our eyes and hearts all the time – and we are called upon to respond, with as much love as possible. I have a new challenge. Yes!!!!  

The Table of Hope, where people's hopes have been written on rough strips of wood that are then made into a table. (D6 Homecoming Centre)

I have to end this post by saying that the highlight of this short holiday has been spending time with my children. Aged 16 and 20, they have busy lives, full of academic deadlines, creative pursuits, and all the wonderful social stuff that young people do, so it was fabulous spending hours and hours with them, just hanging out, cooking, eating, talking, laughing….. I really have no adequate words, right now, for how magical my world is with these two beings in it. My heart swells with love and pride. I am one lucky mother!

                     One of the many ocean pics I took from the train, on our trip to Kalk Bay.