Insomnia and I

                                                                                                         05 January 2013

Here we go again. It’s 03:00, and I’ve given up my attempts at falling sleep. This is crazy! For me, anything could trigger this off, but usually it’s some kind of paranoia that creeps in after seeing geckos in the house, or worse – cockroaches!

Sometimes, when I tell someone I’ve been struggling with insomnia, they reply with some kind of perky suggestion like, “Why don’t you just get up and do something?”  Easier said than done. I always think to myself, “You’ve obviously never had insomnia.” You spend so many hours lying in bed trying to fall asleep, that getting up and doing something is the last thing on your mind. You’re actually tired, and you WANT to sleep. Especially during the school term, when I have to be up early the next day and teach for hours on end, getting to sleep is extremely important. You know that you’ll probably drop off at 4 or 5am, and you have to get up at 5:30am!

Tonight, however, because tomorrow’s a no-stress day, and I only have to be up at about 8, I decided, after much tossing and turning, to journal and then to blog. Also poured myself a nice comforting cup of green tea, which I’m sipping. I’m singing at a wedding next month, and the bride has requested a few French songs, so I’m listening to Madeleine Peyroux. Interesting, now that I’m doing all of this, I’m starting to yawn. Sorry, Madeleine, no reflection on your singing.

One thing’s for sure, I’ll leave a soft light on – just can’t get the sight of the three geckos I saw earlier out of my mind. I watched them with fascinated loathing, freaked out completely! They were in my shower, just off my bedroom, so I used the other bathroom. I suppose this could be called an irrational fear.

Listening to “Cantabile”, an instrumental piece played by the late Michel Petrucciani, Steve Gadd and Anthony Jackson on the “Live in Tokyo” album. Aah, music…. the great soother of spirits.

Ok, now I’m sleepy. Petrucciani trio playing “So What”. Hmmmm. Will leave the soft light and the music on, and drift off……… J